*** (God Soft Hands Jesus)
The reason for this story? To see GSHJ “less darkly” – and a question from Julia: http://justmebeingcurious.com/2015/01/24/to-see-gshj-less-darkly/ (and work forwards if you wish)
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It’s very hard to be in love and not have passions. Very hard.
All I could see was me and Him. And Him and others. But mainly me and Him. That is the essence of “us and them” I think: I have a direct line to God. God talks directly to me. I learn to listen to Him. He and me become us. So you become them.
And it’s so easy to be a God-snob (I really do know): to look down my nose on His behalf at others less bonded than me.
I can do that so easily. Because I am surfing the biggest bestest truest wave of Love. I am surfing God: The Answer is Love. All are Sacred Creations. The Living Word Lives. We are but Players in an Orchestra. And when you are surfing God, you fly the foam! You are up there in soul and spirit! So easy to be looking down.
I am not sure what virus I caught that brought me down. This love story is all about tiny (massive) changes. But I know. I was a God snob. And still can be so easily. If I allow.
And that seems to be my phrase more and more at this point: “If I allow”
If I allow GSHJ to whisper and be heard by me. If I allow GSHJ to whisper through others and be heard by me. If I allow. If I allow each of His creations to be as sacred and loved as I am. Each of His creations – all as perfectly imperfect as I am. Because I am no more than you are. Or else I am not of I am – I am just of my creation of I Am.
(read that last bit slowly – twice – I had to! I hope it says what I mean)
I still have passions. In fact I think have many more passions. Just more inclusive, more accepting, more nurturing. Less me. More you and Him. More you and you. More you and less me.
The odd thing?
It actually draws me closer to Him. I am becoming more GSJH and less me. And what does that mean to me? I have no idea. And I wish never to have a clue.
What I know with conviction is this: The less it is about me – the more it is really about me.
(read that last bit slowly – twice – it’s one of those posts! :-) )
Because the less I worry about me, the more I allow of GSHJ, and the more powerful I seem to become.
I see people differently. I see people more “one by one” than ever before. I see us all being the same. I know when I screw up – and so does He. I know when I feel crap – and so does He. I know when I fuck up – and so does He. I know when I mentally want to bash you head in for really winding me up. I know when I want to bash my own head in for being “stupid”. And so does He.
So when I see you letting your mask slip. I see me. And so does He. And when I see evil. I see me.
And so does He.
You are any one of the rainbow colours making each unique … you prefer to kiss and hug and orgasm with those I don’t … you have been born into a family with no God or a different God … you were born into a family with tons of cash or no cash … you were abused … you are suicidal … you are addicted … you are divorced … you are ill … you are too young to understand (!!) … on and on and on the list of “differences” we obsess with cataloguing and itemising and debating – and judging as right or wrong – of God or not of God.
(just why does theology need to join this obsession?)
More and more I do not see any of that. More and more I see every “rule” our gorgeous God has ever offered as: “To each I give the same love. And each I love the same. How about you?”
I am finding more and more that being a God-snob is really hard work. And when I manage it – it is my choice alone.
Because Love really is the answer to every question. Each one of us really is as sacred as the other. Our differences really do make us stronger because we are all the same. If we allow.
Because if I want you to allow me to be who I am – then logic, science, theology, religion, custom and cultures (and maybe even God?) would all say: You gotta let everyone have that same freedom – you gotta allow everyone.
And where does Lucifer fit any of this? What’s his preference do you think? And how much do we allow his preferences to shape us?
How much do we ignore him and look only at the sanitised symptoms: you have sinned, you are sinning – but fear not – you are forgiven by grace – you are washed clean – you are covered in blood. All you have to do is carry on doing what you are doing. Agreeing with whatever belief means your comfort is maintained. Don’t worry about sin – we have that covered. And please speak up in righteousness and tell others they are wrong – that is just the best!! We all do a dance when you buy-into that crap! But ignore us – we are not real. We are the bump in the night – the heebie-jeebies. Best not to acknowledge us. That might be uncomfortable. Because we really do prefer the darkness. It’s where we feel comfortable.
Speak of the weird shit. Please. It is real.
Lucifer and his army are real. And God is real. And God has power. Way more than the devil, satan, the demons.
If I allow. If you allow. If we allow.
And I wonder if sin is just another label we have deflated (thanks Heather). Because we are all powerful men and women of God (thanks Tom). We are all sacred (thanks LM). We can look to the bible and find love (thanks Don). We do not need to be an orphan (thanks Mel). And almost always this is not about what I want is it (thanks Phil). Because I want to be a lover not a fixer (thanks Denine).
And just when will YOU begin to see GSHJ less darkly? Thank you Julia. Thank you.
(And just like an acceptance speech the list goes on and on – right back to when I was born – and forwards to this day. It must include everyone – even those I passed by without knowing, those I chose to ignore – because even they have shaped who I am. They were my choices. They are also my “if I allow”.)
We are all the same. And this story will never end – ever. Each day it is being lived and written. Each one of us is in this story. Each one of us is this story. We are all connected.
If we allow.