(for someone who desires our prayers)
I came to my daily time with the Lord this morning. And there is a structure – three moments of “rest” on the way to the verses:
Dear Lord as I come to you today fill my heart and my whole being with the wonder of your presence.
I ask that God, through my freedom may orchestrate my desires in a vibrant loving melody rich in harmony.
I pray for the gift of acceptance and forgiveness.
This morning I asked myself: Would I meet my lover in this mood and expect him/her to “make me” love them? If I showed up and said: “I need you to fill my heart … orchestrate my desires” … make me accept you.” Just what might be their response?
And in that mind I came to today’s verses: Lazarus and the Rich Man. And as I read through this well known passage, He drew me to these two verses:
“But Abraham replied, ‘Son, remember that in your lifetime you received your good things, while Lazarus received bad things, but now he is comforted here and you are in agony. And besides all this, between us and you a great chasm has been set in place, so that those who want to go from here to you cannot, nor can anyone cross over from there to us.’ Luke 19:25-26
And then He whispered “God Shopping, Paul?”
And as I wondered what He meant – we shared these “sensory full” films:
Window Shopping. That retail experience where there is nothing between you and the goods you browse. You can touch them, try them for size, put them back, move on. Repeat (and repeat and repeat). I have heard some people actually enjoying spending time this way. I know people who spend the whole day doing that. And when you ask: “What did you get?” – they calmly (calmly!) say: “Nothing.”
Relationship Shopping. That overnight experience in the same bed where there is nothing between you but a bad mood. You can touch them, you can cuddle them, you can get “over it” (whatever it is you can’t get over). But you stay one side of the bed, and they stay the other. Nothing between you but a chasm of emptiness. I have done that quite a few times. In a huff and a grump – with a seething expectation that “they” make the first move.
God Shopping. That lifetime experience of having a relationship with God Soft Hands Guiding Spirit Jesus without ever touching. A relationship of “knowing about” rather than knowing. A relationship of “toenail worship” rather that the worship of desire. A relationship based on “come on God – prove yourself – make me love you – make me need you.”
This morning He whispered, and kept on whispering:
I can do as much heavy lifting as needed. Except I don’t need. Love does not need. Look across the bed. Look across the chasm. There is no “heavy lifting” Paul. There is only an imaginary distance you place between us. And because it is imaginary – why do you allow it to be such a burden, a cross, a hard path, a weight on your shoulders? I have no need to lift that from you. Nor should you.
Needs makes Love a burden, a cross, a hard path, a weight on your shoulders. Need makes it too much for you do on your own. Need imagines that imaginary chasm, that space in the bed, that “too impossible to cross.” Need is Fear. Need is Guilt. Need is a Burden.
That is why Love never Needs. Love only Desires. Desire Me as I desire you. That is Love.
Please don’t let your “imagination of distance” between us become an “eternity of distance” between us. The time you have for sowing is but a short season, and what you sow now, you reap for eternity.
I Desire You! I always have and I always will. Don’t need Me. Desire Me.
Taken from “Lazarus and the Rich Man”: