How do you say goodbye to the people you love the most? I just hope they understand.
Published June 3, 2015 by scarredandscared
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Dear Scarred and Sacred –
I read your post in our kitchen. The back door was open – it’s a warm sunny day. In the garden beyond the fence there is a bushy tree: whispery kind of stems and leaves. Fragile looking.
The tips of the stems were blowing back and forth in the wind.
“That’s how it feels, Paul”
”How do I say goodbye when my whole world and universe is on the very tip of that stem – blowing this way and that – no strength – no control – no connection. Isolated. Desolated. Alone. Desperate to be connected. Dying day by day. ”
Lord – you mean Scarred and Scared?
”Yes – scarredandscared””
I am praying Lord, maybe coming to you is the answer. I am praying – it’s all I can do.
”Write, Payl. Write.”
Write what Lord? Words for the sake of it – platitudes – irrelevancies – what Lord?
”Write that bush. Write the tips. Write that each tip is connected – has to be connected – must be connected. There is no “how do I say goodbye” – she is connected – she is part – she is one with all and all with one. Do it quickly, Paul. Do it now.”
Dear scarredandscared –
You are that bush, and so am I – and so are all the ones you love – all the ones you are yet to love. You see this tip, others see within – the branches. Some blow this way and that – others less so.
Yet you are as connected to all as they are to you. We are all connected. Look down the stem and see the branches, see the trunk, see the roots. That is you. That is as much of you as the tip. You cannot say goodbye because you remain connected. In this life or the next. Always.
You don’t have to believe in “God” – I sometimes wonder if I do. I believe in Love. That goodness within. That source of who we are and why we are. I hear voices. I hear lots of voices. But I hear One Voice. I call him God. It works for me. He pops up all the time – like when I am looking out into the garden. He is always. He never changes. Apart from getting bigger and more beautiful. Apart from becoming more entwined in everything I do.
I hear voices. And I don’t ever want His voice to stop. You can hear Him. He speaks to everyone. In a perfectly perfect way for each. Listen for His voice. You will know it. It is loving. Gentle. Kind. Never demanding. Inviting. Patient. Always there just for you.
He asked me to write. And when He asks I trust Him. Because He never hurts (doesn’t always explain either). And the odd thing?
Haven written He and you will do whatever He and you want. My part in this is done.
Apart from picturing you hearing that wonderful Voice. Apart from asking Him to shout a bit louder so you can. Apart from waiting. Until you are ready to be who you want to be. Who you hope to be.
How do you say goodbye? Look them in the eye and say “help.” That’s all. Help me. You just did. And He heard. He always does.
Over to you.