The things I didn’t say: Dr Hook

Dear scarredandscared –

There have been times I wished you would put comments back under your posts. There have been times I have wondered if you are posting stuff to see what happens. There have been times when I have felt completely helpless. There have been times I have wondered if reblogging your post and writing to you like this just pisses you off even more. I wonder if you even read these words. I have no idea really. And I wonder if you think anything similar as you reach for the keyboard one more time. Does it matter.

I have no idea what you are living with, coping with, being beaten down by, how each day is the same or different. You have no idea of my days or living.  Does it matter?

I have no answers – those are for you to find. Your choice. Always.

My choice? You are alive. You are breathing. And I choose to connect with you. I choose to stand with you. I choose to say that. My choice. Not yours. Mine. I have no idea if you can see a different way. I have no idea if I am hurting you or helping you. I am past caring as well. I am here for as long as you want to be here. Because your life is precious. Always has been. Always will. And I will never apologise for seeing you as  “preciousandperfect”.

So “things I will say” … no more “scarredandscared” … today and always: “preciousandperfect”.

Your life and living is unique – your past, present and future. That is why you are precious and perfect. Pain? Crap to that. All of us have pain. Yours is more than mine? I guess so. Yours is more important than mine? Maybe. I am past caring who has more or less on the scale of living on the scale of pain.

One chance. One day. One moment. That is all each one gets.

“I didn’t say don’t do it when she packed up to go …”

Dear preciousandperfect – don’t go – don’t do it.

Your choice. Always.



I know I’m a burden to the people in my life.  I can’t stand it anymore.  I can’t live like this.  I don’t want to live like this. I want it over NOW

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