Just another mystery


”‘Beware of practising your piety before others in order to be seen by them; for then you have no reward from your Father in heaven.”” Matthew 6:1

Since GSHJ and I began holding hands, the more I “relationship.” And for some time now, that that has included words. In the case of these verses, that word “reward” – it becomes a living breathing wriggler. A shiny gold-plated word. Because the gold-plate hides the inside. Making it something never intended. And the word breathes and moves. Beckoning. Like a sign post. A marker. Pointing to a great chest. Other shiny rewards. My treasure chest of reward.

I find it a little odd.

Being a person I grew up with words. Just as breath is to life, so words are to connection. They just are. So where does it come from, this imagery of a breathing wriggler?

Just another mystery in the chest of mysteries. What you do with it is the question.

I don’t know Lord, this relationship with words is part of our relationship. Almost a way for You to “breathe into me” a little easier, a little faster, a more immediate way. A way of connecting “without words” through words – if that makes any sense at all.

Yes it does, Paul. Yes it does.

A way of seeding pictures – a thousand words in one word. An immediate sense of beauty, or greed, or right, or wrong. A channel linking You with me and me with You.

And reward? Why that word? Why out of a passage of verses – why from all my words that word – why “reward”? if what you sense is true, why that word – why this morning – why “relationship”?

(I am writing these words for others aren’t I Lord? I am giving You words for others.)

Yes. Is that bad?

Maybe. Maybe not. It’s just that we keep sharing so quickly. Too quickly to describe. Like even as I was typing “Maybe. Maybe not” You were showing me so many things – you on that mountain, “talking for others” – talking for God. Giving your words to God. For others. Giving words of Love in words others would hear and make their own. So if I do it how different is that? And is it really okay to compare this with “that” – and then if I am really am your Son – a son of God – how is it really different? Why should I fear “putting words in your mouth” – when these are the words you put in mine?

Relationship with words? You mentioned having “relationship with words”.

It’s like when I see a word I get a tug. A physical tug inside. Like “reward” – an immediate pull. A pull that says “caution” – a sense of “what it says on the tin is not what is in the tin” – an immediate “stop and do not pass go”. And then I hesitate because You said that word. You repeated that word. You use that word as an “okay” word – and here I am painting it red. Why?

You know. We know. I know.

Do I have to be that honest, Lord.

What is there to fear? Others and what they may think? What an other may take – or more probable – to simply pass by? Do not be scared of writing about our conversations. What else are the gospels – the whole new testament – than “conversations”? And the old one that you still stay away from? I will tell you – because you don’t yet know – it is just more conversations.

Relationship with words, relationship through words, relationship within words. The Word.

Yeah, yeah … that was John. It’s all got a little blown out of proportion. It’s what you all do. Take a word and plate it with gold. Take “My Word” and plate it with gold. Make it something it never was, never is. How can you gold-plate conversations and make them objects? How can you then live your life following objects – is that not just another “law”? Another treasure chest to be filled with “reward” for another life? Is that not counting the “new law” of love? Another set of rules and regulations. Another transaction life?

So, the bible is conversations, and the words are not rules – not to become more “objects” and “rewards” in their own right. The words are conversations I have again with You?

Now read the words you have just written, Paul. What else have we done?

Does this need spell-checking and tidying up, Lord? Seems kind of raw and confusing.

I Am always “raw” – if you allow.

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Just another mystery in the chest of mysteries.
What you do with it is the question.

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