conflicting feelings


”I love you, your Good enough, you’ll always be enough for me”
We all want that because we were all made that way.
“Why do I need it and how do I make it stop??”
By taking that scary step to be what we were all made to be – loved. Without conditions. Unconditionally. Freely. With complete freedom to be who we are, who we were made to be.
“I want to scream I Fucking hate you and mean it while my Bullshit heart just wants to me loved.”
Sometimes I hurt like crazy for no reason at all. You have plenty of reasons. But I still want to be loved. Without conditions. Unconditionally. Freely. With complete freedom to be who we are, who we were made to be.
“I don’t want to need anyone.”
Nor me.

“Tomorrow is a massive day again.”
You make my heart sing! This post makes me jump for joy. You are talking about tomorrow. You are talking about love.

I will be thinking of you tomorrow. Again.
((hugs))

scarredandscared

I feel all sad or all happy. At the moment I’m both which is just weird. Half of me says”you’re doing great, you’ll get through this” then without warning “this is not ok” and a feeling of doom comes over me.

Tomorrow is a massive day again.  His assessment. I just realised I’m scared they’ll find he’s crazy and therefore things ‘aren’t his fault’ or something like that.  Maybe I’m scared that they’ll find him crazy and everyone will think ‘that’s where she got it from’. Will I always be known as his daughter?’ Will I always be the “fucked up” one? I want to be associated with someone else, I want to be the one that got better, despite the odds.  The one that made a recovery, the one that people say “wow, she made it!”.

I don’t want to be the one that drives people crazy – That…

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