In different areas of my life I bump into men who are attracted to men. It’s not a big deal. It comes up in normal conversation. Some men talk about Susan and Jenny. Some men talk about Ralph and Edward. Almost no men talk about the bedroom and getting sweaty. But we all talk about the tsunami of a “hormone wave” when that “other person” comes into our lives. Men usually have no idea what to do with it when it sweeps men away.
But I (almost) never talk about the last time I made love. And nor do they. Unless it’s bullshit. We talk about football. Football gets a lot of time. And music. That as well. And gossip. And work. And money. All of that much more than relationships (unless that “tsunami” is on the go). And we laugh a lot – at each other – with each other. All the blarney and bullshit – there is a lot of that!
And I find the same thing when a bunch of men and women are together. Same stuff. Same topics (just less football usually). Same vulnerabilities. Same bullshit. Same laughter. One difference: women go off to the toilet together (I have never had an explanation that made any sense).
And walk in on a bunch of women and the conversation either stops or is unintelligible (I have heard women say the same thing about walking in on men). Because women together can be as graphic as men – can be as “vulgar” as men. And they do talk about bedroom stuff more than men. I think that is because for men it’s mostly a “performance issue”. With women it’s not so much.
So to religion. And this massive obsession – the “LGBT stuff”. Let’s be clear about one thing:
If ANYONE asks me about my bedroom … if ANYONE insists they have the right to do that … if ANYONE intrudes on my intimacy and privacy in the name of God … And if ANYONE feels duty-bound to force their beliefs on me … if ANYONE feels they have power over my inclusion in God stuff … if anyone acts on that because their “power” and right is enshrined in “their“ (unspoken) missionary position … And if anyone reads their bible to find justification to ignore my plea for them to stop … if ANYONE insists they can and will and must force that on me … force themselves on me and my God …
That IS spiritual rape. That is REAL abuse.
Yesterday’s post comes to mind: “The “difficult verses””
Do not commit murder? Don’t get angry in the first place. Do not break an oath? Do not make an oath in the first place! Eye for an eye? Go the extra mile without being asked. Love your neighbour/hate your enemy? Love everyone including your enemies. Tithing and giving? In private. Praying and showing off in public? Why would you want to do that. Wealth and possessions? Think about what that will give you long-term. Worry, worry, worry? Look around at what lives and breathes – I care for you in the same way as each petal on each flower. And so the list goes on.
My Lord and Father reaches out with love-absent-of-all-judgement. My Lord and Father reaches out without demanding-change-before-reaching-out. And my Lord and Father is described over hundreds of years in every book of the bible and in all those many chapters and verses within all those books. And the ONLY God I see described is a God of Unconditional Love. A God who would die for each of us. Who did die for us. Each one (not just the ones you decide He died for).
So you want to find one verse in all of that which justifies you judging me? You want to reach out to me only to change me? You want to reach out so I tell you that you are right and I am wrong? You want me to change me to be who you are …?
Then you only reach out to destroy who I am. You only reach out insisting you have the right to rape me. You assume the God given right to come into my bedroom whilst preaching the sanctity of yours.
Men don’t do that. Women don’t do that. People don’t do that. Not even God does that.
So why do you?
(Triggered this morning by a lovely post from the “thesmilingpilgrim” – LGBT Christianity – and inspired by MUCH religion and LITTLE God)