I am and you are.  We all are.

Even the ones we don’t like much, agree with much, or even see much.

I have seen family. There is no such thing as dysfunctional family I think. There is family or there is not.  And birth or blood does not qualify any of us by right.

You will have heard the phrase “blood is thicker than water”.  And while that may be a fact it is not applicable in all cases “blood is not thicker than love”.  Adopted children, step-children, children who grow up without a “blood parent” can tell you that – why even two lovers who become parents (who legally cannot be “blood”) can tell you that.

Love is relationship and safety and permanency and being loved. And that is family. Except that being loved does not mean being agreed with, or being taken seriously all the time, or being able to tell everyone else what to do and think.

Love is relationship and safety and permanency and being loved. And that is family. Except relationship isn’t being the same in every thought and desire and mood and temperament. Love is about complimenting each other in our differences.

Love is relationship and safety and permanency and being loved. And that is family. Except safety isn’t about being always allowed to go and do what I want, safety is about taking risks as well as not taking risks, and safety is about looking out for others as well as yourself.

Love is relationship and safety and permanency and being loved. And that is family. Except being loved is not all about being loved as I want to be loved, being loved is about another (and others) caring more for me as much and more than they do themselves. And that is expressed in many different – and new to me – ways.

Love is relationship and safety and permanency and being loved.

And that is the family.

And if you find that in science – well done. If you find that is God – well done. If you find it anything – well done. But if you cannot find that in each other – then not so well done.

(shall we talk about lodgers again?)

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