One week ago.


I realized as I began my nightly ritual that I have not written for a week,neither have I visited here during this time.

I kiss her hands and feet, her face and Snowy,the Polar Bear I knitted for her. My wife of 20 years next August 21 st.

Her Corneal transplant is failing and she has been diagnosed,once again as “Legally blind”. This time it is worse and massive doses of Cortisone is causing her lovely hair to fall out. We have spoken about a remote control for her Wheelchair.

O Lord,we are scared!

I would be untruthful if I said I had not remonstrated with God. God doesn’t send this for spite or trial or sin. He does not send at all. God is with us if we allow him in.

So often people part company with a a deity that seems to do nothing else but jerk our strings,because God,you….##$% took away the light of my wife.

I feel so sad my chest hurts with the pain of the living to come.

This entry was posted in Doubts, Questions and tagged , , , , by Andrew Blair. Bookmark the permalink.

About Andrew Blair

Living in Maroubra Australia. Carer for my wife Jessica. Simple web designer and Administrator; photographer, artist and theologian. (Ordained by a Celtic bishop), we now attend the Uniting Church Additionally Since the age of 17 I live with uncontrollable Epilepsy and Bipolar Affective Disorder with some Psychotic episodes, for the past 4 years, at least I have been bipolar depressed with no real excitement, periodic bouts of paranoia and other yuck.

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